I’m here. I’m here. You can’t avoid me! You can’t run away from me!
Whenever a situation of suffering comes up, we aren’t able to bear it. C’mon face it. Even if we put on your adult mind and say let’s look for a solution, at the first instant the child inside you wants to come out crying and say please help me. But then, we suppress the cry and go on to think like an adult.
We may be hurt by something or someone. But what do we do about it at that moment? We constantly entertain ourselves, watch movies, listen to music, socialize or resort to alcohol. We totally block the child within ourselves which wants love and care at that moment, because we do not want to experience that suffering.
We all go through painful times in life. When we come across a similar situation, we want to forget about it and stuff the memory deep down the unconscious mind. We do not ever want to face the child that we are shoving further down inside us by this.
The wounded child is there, always, and we don’t want to feel it. That child is further being wounded and needs our attention, but we turn away from it, afraid we may scrape old wounds and be hurt all over again. Just because we ignore it, doesn’t mean that child isn’t there. Running away this way doesn’t help us get past the suffering. It only prolongs the suffering.
To tackle these situations, we must make use of the awakening that is etched into us genetically. The first thing to do is to express. We see it evidently in children, that at any point, they express themselves very well. They do not hide emotions, they come out and cry if they want to, laugh if they want to, smile if they want to, fear if they want to. All these emotions come out if and when they want to. They do not hesitate from expression.
As adults, we are enforced to a society having fixed set of accepted emotions and situations. A situation is faced with two reactions from the society that surrounds you. It applies to all kinds of situations. If something delightful happens in your life, one section is happy for you, while the other is left grudging. If something uncalled for happens, while one section of your society will feel bad for you, being your well – wishers, the other section of people are only contented about it. Either ways, one section is happy and the other isn’t.
When we know this is going to be the situation anyway, then why don’t we express ourselves and make our views evident about our own life?
The goal must be to make ourselves socially compliant, while maintaining personal happiness. A simple way is to do it as well as maintain it, has been ingrained into us since we were born.
We may have lost it along the way.
The trick is to use the adult mind to think while letting the child inside you, express emotions. Once we get the hold of it, we will be able to control our mind along with letting any kind of feelings, whether resentment and distress, or, contentment and comfort, flow out and not get clogged inside us.
When faced with a situation of suffering, cry your heart out. That is human instinct and it is NOT AT ALL inapt to cry. Once the child in you has come out with the emotion, you know what to tackle in life, whether it is sorrow or regret.
When faced with a painful memory once again, do not run away from it. All painful memories have a good time before them. Live for them and not for remorse.
When you are hurt physically, it is only natural for us to apply some kind of medicine and make it feel better. We do not cover it with clothes and pretend it never happened. Because it hurts to look back it, but then we eventually have to, since we need to be well for our life to continue. Similarly, getting hurt emotionally doesn’t mean resort to other things to take our attention away from it, because eventually you need to go back to tend to it in order for you to life a normal life. So let the child within you come out and talk. Let it talk so that it knows why it isn’t getting the love and care it wants at that moment.
Nurse that child, don’t push it down because it only yearns for love. Listen to your inner child; it knows what’s wrong. This Children’s day, learn to help the child within you, and see many problems of your life getting solved like child’s play!